Hey guys!
I hope you are all doing well and staying happy :)
Answer this question for me- Can we truly move on from a situation without forgiving the person who did us wrong?
I asked a few people this question earlier on in the day and the answers I received varied on the spectrum, (yes we can and no we most definitely can't) there is no wrong answer it is down to how you are feeling at the time and whatever you think is going to help you best.
I have come to the understanding that to some people forgiving somebody for their actions provides them with closure. Many people find it hard to move on without closure, which is completely understandable, especially if you really cared and you are left with unanswered questions. Therefore this forgiveness gets rid of these questions because you have decided to be at peace with yourself despite the actions of the other individual.
However personally I feel as though when you have really tried to save something but your efforts failed because the other person wasn't willing to cooperate, and not because they can't but because they simply do not want to, then you get to a point where you lose respect for them and when that happens forgiveness means nothing. You may feel like you can't forgive them just yet, this may be because they simply don't deserve your forgiveness or that you don't want their behaviour to be excused so easily.
I believe that if you still want to have this person in your future then finding some way to forgive them will come easier to you than somebody who no longer feels the need to have this person in their life anymore.
By realising that they no longer need this person in their life this person has created their own peace because they have changed their mindset.
I think that being able to forgive somebody makes a person very brave because the amount of persuasion that goes on in an individual's head to allow themselves to trust a person again is difficult and you have to believe that the next time will better.
With this being said I also believe that those who are no longer able to forgive somebody for their actions are also brave because they have had to convince themself that removing themself from 'said situation' is better than giving it another go. Now this doesn't mean they have given up this means that they tried and tried and possibly even gave it one last shot but at the end of the day they realised they weren't receiving any effort back, and there is only a certain amount of times a person can do this before they realise there is a reason why the other person isn't doing anything back. They may still miss this person but are just too hurt to forgive them.
I truly believe this, forgiveness does take time and I think that you can only really forgive somebody when you are ready to do so, when you have surpassed being hurt.
The other person can not fasten this process just because it makes them feel bad and guilty.
Take your time, breath and take it day by day.
A 'sorry' only means something if the change of actions also support it.
Thanks :)
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